August 14, 2026

Where: the neighborhood

When: 6:00 pm

Bird Species: American robin, gray catbird, house finch, mourning dove, European starling, house sparrow times a billion

Things I Thought About:

• A former co-worker and subscriber tells me she is now concerned that the reason I looked so serene in unpleasant meetings is because I was visualizing myself hitting her over the head with a shovel and burying her in concrete. Is my imagination too good?
• I never would. My imagination actually is too good, it would upset me.
• What actually in the hell is going on on this street? There are birds in gangs.

• The reason I look so serene in meetings is because I sit with my hands demurely cupped, fingers curled loosely over their opposites like the way we all learned to wash our hands in 2020, and while looking at whoever is speaking, I use my index finger to write "fuck this, fuck you" into my palm while trying keep the movement entirely unnoticed. It's a challenge; sometimes it can take the whole meeting to get to the U. It makes me look engaged, and it's fun.

• Many years ago, surely more than a decade now, in peak fun twitter times, some radio station that was changing its format played Nelly's "Hot in Herre" for 24 hours straight. It was such a fun night, to watch people in that market slowly lose their minds, as each time the song stopped, it started again. More people tuning in, increasing all caps confusion and hysterics through the night.
• I am looking at a flowering tree that has maybe 35 house sparrows in it, and every 15 seconds or so two more fly in, and it is making my laugh out loud at this point, every time more join the party. Good gracious, ass is bodacious for the 63rd time levels of "How is this still happening??" I cannot believe how many sparrows are around tonight. I may have to look some shit up when I get home.
• There are teachers bringing teacher stuff into the elementary school in wheeled tote bags. Summer is almost over.

BOTD: House sparrows. There was simply no other option.

The first thing I noticed when turning the corner onto that street, a part of my regular route, was that rooftop in the featured photo. A lot of people are afraid of birds, did you know that? I wouldn't blame anyone who found this gathering vaguely unsettling. I am second to none in my appreciation of the humble, nuisance house sparrow, but I pulled into my driveway after a long day of work on a Friday and saw that many birds on the roof, I might throw it into reverse and go to a bar for a while.

I genuinely had a thought of "oh, is there something dead in their attic?" as if that would attract sparrows, and not crows. But they didn't seem interested in the house, they seemed interested in the neighboring house, which, as I got closer, I saw had a new bird bath.

I'm not sure I believe that one high powered bird bath is sufficient to account for this many birds, though. I exaggerate a lot, but I genuinely believe that there were over 100 sparrows in this half a block. Everywhere I looked there were not one or two, like usual, but ten or more.

I didn't get one decent shot of a close-up bird. I was trying like hell to catch one in the flowering tree, but the sun was very low by then and I couldn't get the settings right. I watched that tree for fully 15 minutes, as more and more sparrows filled it like a reverse clown car. A pretty good time. Another wild Friday night for your old pal Sara Kate.